North by Southwestern

The interview at Southwestern in Dallas seemed to go very well. The people were very nice, Parkland is an amazing facility and my husband and I were able to enjoy some hockey. We drove up on Friday to go to the Dallas Stars game. It was great and by the end we were cheering for the Stars. Jussi Jokinen had 4 goals. We hadn't ever seen a player do that in an NHL game that we had attended.

So the next morning I get all gussied up and head over to the interview. The standard presentation about the school was made and then we broke up for the tour. My guide was a 4th year who wants to do OB/GYN and is interviewing now. She was great. We saw the place where Kennedy died. It is no longer part of the ER and just a simple plaque commerates the place and date. The ER was rockin'. It really looked like ER, the TV show. Had some real characters in there, too. We went to the newborn nursery and saw some of the babies, it was packed, too. After that, off to interview. Again, like all of the other interviews, I have felt exceedingly comfortable, had good conversations and felt that I did well when I walked out. Unfortunately, UT-Southwestern has already sent out a lot of acceptance letters pre-match. So, I don't know what I will hear. I ate lunch with a couple of 3rd years who were real characters and then was picked up to head home.

It was good to see some of the people from other locals where I have interviewed. Having someone to chat with eases the tension of the day. I was amused about a conversation that I had with another applicant about SDN. We both are sick of a girl that posts way too much on the Texas group. She is a reapplicant who wants to go to UT-Houston and has spent the last 6 months whining about everything. For some reason she developed a following. She was accepted this time pre-match. So now she is the guru telling everyone, "Don't worry, you'll get in, there are plenty of spots." We both wanted to slap her. If all you had to do is gripe and whine for 6 months, I wish I had known, I can do that with the best of 'em. My MCAT buddy brought me flowers and a lovely card with the message "Keep your chin up!" It was so sweet. But, at the end of the day, I can't say I am going to be a doctor yet. And that is not a very comforting message. I now get to wait the 2.5 months until the February match. Hopefully I will hear something then. If not, I hate to think about it.

A very disappointing day. . .

November 15th is the day that Texas medical schools can offer pre-match acceptances. I stayed up until midnight on that night to see if I would get an email. Just after midnight, my inbox flashed. It was the Texbirds listserv evening message. That was all that I received. I began watching on SDN as people began to get acceptances. While exciting for them, that only made me feel worse. UTH was the only school that I would have heard from at midnight. UTHSCSA mails offers that day. I noticed that some students were beginning to get acceptances to SA though. I asked and they said that they had called to get the news. I called. I got the "You were not in the first batch, but we are sending more offers out in two weeks." speech. I said thanks and hung up the phone. I really felt that I nailed the interviews at both of these schools, so not receiving at least one acceptance was truly disappointing for me. I called and talked with my mom and later my husband and received the obligatory pep talk. I do know that there will be more offers and then the match, but that just doesn't make me feel better NOW. I have horrible self-doubt now. Did I put my family through all of this for nothing? Did we spend the thousands of dollars on school and MCAT prep and test and applying and interview outfits and make-up and lodging just to not receive anything? To a 21-year-old, waiting to reapply the next year is painful, but doable. They have years. For me, I don't know if I want to go through this process again if I am not accepted. Is it my place in life to be an overworked, underpaid, underappreciated public school teacher? Is it my place to have some other job? How would I explain this to my daughter? Do I say "Mommy got really close to acheiving her dream, but we need to try again next year or never?"

I have to try to figure out some answers in the next 24 hours because I am going to interview at UT-Southwestern in Dallas tomorrow.

I only wanted to be able to say "I am going to be a doctor." today. I guess I just need to suck it up. It hasn't come easy so far, I doubt it ever will.

Remember the Alamo!

I had another interview on October 29th at UTHSC - San Antonio. It was a great experience also. I drove to San Antonio the night before my interview and arrived just at dusk, in time to see where I would need to park the next day. The hotel that I stayed at was almost directly across the street, so I just had to worry about getting up in time. Monday morning, looking sharp, I headed outside to the most picture perfect weather. Cool, not a cloud in the sky with bright sunshine. Once I parked and finally found my way to the reception area, I was able to check in. It is amazing how goofy a group of interviewees looks. Everyone in suits and ties with uncomfortable shoes. It is so obvious that none of these folks ever wear this attire. We trooped down to the auditorium and listened to Dr. Jones present about the school and then some 4th year med students answer questions. Again, I was impressed. After the tour and interviews I cut out to head home to work the next day. This is such a tough position to be in. I would love to go to that school also. Of course, if no one offers me a spot it won't matter. But, I think that I did well on the interviews, again more conversational that grilling. I finally did get a dreaded canned interview question in which I was asked to basically solve the healthcare crisis in about 3 minutes of time. HA!

After returning to work I was again pleasantly surprised to receive an invitation from UT - Southwestern. I will head to Dallas with Steven on Friday for the Saturday interview. Of course the big day falls in between that. NOVEMBER 15th. The first day that offers of acceptance can be given to Texas residents. I would love to hear from either Houston or San Antonio and then cancel Dallas. But we are going to go to a hockey game on Friday night as our anniversary outing, so I might as well go and see what all of the fuss is about at Southwestern. While I am not really research oriented, academic medicine might have a draw. We'll see. . .